Opportunities
Interesting that when I lose something important in my life, here comes another reminder that I have a full life--several times over.
For example, Lee. I love Lee. He's a friend, a co-worker, my Martial Arts Sibak (Hawaiian Kajukenbo). Lee's going in a different direction that will take him away from the several times a week I see him, to a few, or one. (Girlfriends do that, I guess.)
And then there's Scott--my best friend and sci-fi guru--who has a new job and now, no phone. My weekly sessions with him stopped a few months back. Now, he doesn't email for whatever reason. I'm back to having many, many people in my life, but no one stable or a real friend.
So, enter the positive thinking/Psychology of Success/Law of Attraction crowd/fad that's circling the workplace in the last few months... and I have much to do. Much. To. Do.
I sat one Sunday morning on the front porch with most of Show Low passing by while I was on-call (which didn't happen as I tried to be positive that there would be NO crisis-es... at least for the morning) and thought about all the things I wanted. What were my goals? What did I want on my epitaph? That kind of thing. The list astounded me:
Writing: My short stories (appearing in Beacons of Tomorrow, Vol 1 and 2), my novel(s?), my monthly newsletter (Tyrannosaourus.com Press/Illuminata) and my idea for telling the real-life stories of loved ones--YourLifePublications--a publishing company to help our elders tell their stories.
Flying: Getting my pilot's license for small aircraft, glider and really cool, helicopter.
Music: performing, writing, (guitar. vocal, piano, flute, trumpet, clarinet, percussion) Bardic circle and filking.
Martial Arts: Black belt in Kenpo and then begin to work in mixed styles. (This will require dropping 70 lbs and having much better endurance.) I want to see Sibak Lee Crocker earn his next ranking belt--and more!
Relationships: Make new friends, but keep the old. Satisfying relationships that consist of laughing and dancing and joy--silence and realness and acceptance of our human-ness.
Financial: Learn about finances--what is this all about, how do I save money, make money, invest and have so much that I can give it away to help others. Since I work in the mental health "industry", there are so many legitimate needs for things like medication, housing, trained companionship. Some just need that extra help to jump start their lives again. I see it daily and could help so much without being codependent. The goal is to make waaaay over what I need so I can go waaay over my tithe, buy my planes/helicopter, and have my hangar/house/dojo.
Spiritually/Mentally: Find balance; meditation and enlightenment. Stretch my mind and make peace with my human-ness. Learn Reiki. What would be especially cool would be to be able to throw energy balls and make things move with my thoughts. Understanding outer body experiences would be appreciated. Grow in Wisdom and Grace.
Teacher/Educator: I want to see the rapt, "ah - ha" on peoples' faces. I want them to remember what they need to know, grow in wisdom (and remember their teacher fondly).
Acting/Performing: I don't want to be "famous". I just like to act. I want to be discovered and do plays and movies and voice parts. I am already an actor (Harry Chapin said it best), now I want to really play a part, not just act my part.
Creativity: I make things. I have hands that soothe and whittle and see those engineering connections to make things work.
I have this little voice or reminder or conscience that repeats, "Redeem the time." It's my mantra sometimes.
So, my friends, I will miss you--terribly. And I will write to you and about you, will fly over your houses and be your friends. But life isn't over because you move from me. My world continues to expand with or without you. It'd be more fun with you, but, those are your decisions.
For example, Lee. I love Lee. He's a friend, a co-worker, my Martial Arts Sibak (Hawaiian Kajukenbo). Lee's going in a different direction that will take him away from the several times a week I see him, to a few, or one. (Girlfriends do that, I guess.)
And then there's Scott--my best friend and sci-fi guru--who has a new job and now, no phone. My weekly sessions with him stopped a few months back. Now, he doesn't email for whatever reason. I'm back to having many, many people in my life, but no one stable or a real friend.
So, enter the positive thinking/Psychology of Success/Law of Attraction crowd/fad that's circling the workplace in the last few months... and I have much to do. Much. To. Do.
I sat one Sunday morning on the front porch with most of Show Low passing by while I was on-call (which didn't happen as I tried to be positive that there would be NO crisis-es... at least for the morning) and thought about all the things I wanted. What were my goals? What did I want on my epitaph? That kind of thing. The list astounded me:
Writing: My short stories (appearing in Beacons of Tomorrow, Vol 1 and 2), my novel(s?), my monthly newsletter (Tyrannosaourus.com Press/Illuminata) and my idea for telling the real-life stories of loved ones--YourLifePublications--a publishing company to help our elders tell their stories.
Flying: Getting my pilot's license for small aircraft, glider and really cool, helicopter.
Music: performing, writing, (guitar. vocal, piano, flute, trumpet, clarinet, percussion) Bardic circle and filking.
Martial Arts: Black belt in Kenpo and then begin to work in mixed styles. (This will require dropping 70 lbs and having much better endurance.) I want to see Sibak Lee Crocker earn his next ranking belt--and more!
Relationships: Make new friends, but keep the old. Satisfying relationships that consist of laughing and dancing and joy--silence and realness and acceptance of our human-ness.
Financial: Learn about finances--what is this all about, how do I save money, make money, invest and have so much that I can give it away to help others. Since I work in the mental health "industry", there are so many legitimate needs for things like medication, housing, trained companionship. Some just need that extra help to jump start their lives again. I see it daily and could help so much without being codependent. The goal is to make waaaay over what I need so I can go waaay over my tithe, buy my planes/helicopter, and have my hangar/house/dojo.
Spiritually/Mentally: Find balance; meditation and enlightenment. Stretch my mind and make peace with my human-ness. Learn Reiki. What would be especially cool would be to be able to throw energy balls and make things move with my thoughts. Understanding outer body experiences would be appreciated. Grow in Wisdom and Grace.
Teacher/Educator: I want to see the rapt, "ah - ha" on peoples' faces. I want them to remember what they need to know, grow in wisdom (and remember their teacher fondly).
Acting/Performing: I don't want to be "famous". I just like to act. I want to be discovered and do plays and movies and voice parts. I am already an actor (Harry Chapin said it best), now I want to really play a part, not just act my part.
Creativity: I make things. I have hands that soothe and whittle and see those engineering connections to make things work.
I have this little voice or reminder or conscience that repeats, "Redeem the time." It's my mantra sometimes.
So, my friends, I will miss you--terribly. And I will write to you and about you, will fly over your houses and be your friends. But life isn't over because you move from me. My world continues to expand with or without you. It'd be more fun with you, but, those are your decisions.
posted by montanasings @ 5:16 PM
